Tips to regain sexual desire

There are ups and downs in most relationships, and therefore there will inevitably be times when your sex life will also be affected.

The most important thing is to be open with your partner and communicate any concerns or desires you may have.

Here are some helpful hints to kick-start things if needed:
  • Make time for your partner.
  • Communicate what you want in your sex life and be open to new suggestions.
  • Explore your and your partner's sexual fantasies and desires.
  • To vary location and try unusual places such as a fancy hotel, outside...
  • To try your partner with his/her daily activities (for example, shopping, household chores, children) so that you both can be more relaxed.
  • Women could try seducing their partners with new clothes, perfume, make-up and/or sexy lingerie.
  • Listen to sensual music when you make love.
  • Cuddle and hug your partner.
  • Take baths together.
  • Incorporate massages into foreplay.
  • Take your partner by surprise.
  • Try sex toys.
  • Dress-up or play roles.
  • Send erotic text messages or emails.
  • Seduce your partner with suggestive comments.
  • Reduce distractions such as the TV or mobile phone when intimate with your partner.
  • Socialise with other couples and friends
  • To go on dates and holidays together, without the children if possible.
  • Take care of your body by being healthy and exercising - this will boost your own sex drive and will hopefully instigate a response in your partner.

Sexual Myths

  • The quality of your sex life is not determined by the number of times you make love.
  • There is no "normal" quantity of sex you should be having.
  • For example, some couples make love only once or twice per month, but in an intense way and they are completely satisfied with this.
  • However, if your sexual needs differ to your partners, it can cause frustration and difficulties within your relationship.
  • Do not compare your sex life to your friends, who have different relationships and needs, or the media.
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