Tried to conceive

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- - Latest reply: Alessia.Violet
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- Oct 13, 2018 at 05:14 PM
Hello,
since I have been in my early twenties i have experienced fluctuations in weight. after i got married, my husband and i tried to conceive, but it took us a long time, and we even started to feel so dejected about our situation. eventually i did conceive, however, i had a miscarriage. it was the toughest moment of my life. i felt like i would never feel happy again ,adn i felt that i had let everyone down. i had let my family, my inlaws and my husband down. i felt totally sick with myself. over the past few months, I have been trying to put myself back together again and i have tried to be strong for the sake of my husband. we have started to look at alternative ways of having a baby, and we have been researching surrogacy too. i was very curious to know about this since it seems like a good option to me, and i have seen a lot of people say that it has been like a godsend to them. before jumping into it, however, i have been going to forums such as this and trying to figure out what the best way of going about this would be. i want to have the opinion of as many people who have gone through this so that my husband and i can make a good decision for ourselves.
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Hello! First of all this a good thing that you both want to go for a child even after so many difficulties. If there is a will there is a way. Your idea of surrogacy is good and welcoming. But before taking any decision please consult a specialist and research on it thoroughly. There are a lot of couples who are having babies through surrogacy. All the best and you will surely be a good and happy mother.
Respond to prerona25
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Hi! I can see that you are a strong woman. I am glad that you will not give up. Surrogacy may be a good solution for you. Have you found a good clinic for this treatment. I don't know about surrogacy, I went in Ukraine for ivf. I have very good experience. Hope you will solve your problem too. I wish you all the best in life.
Respond to EminaD
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It's great that you didn't lose your hope after all you troubles. I am very sorry that you have all this problems. I know how you feel but you mustn't blame yourself for this condition. Please, calm down and try to keep only good thoughts. Think hard about your next step. See with your husband and your doctor what would be the best alternative for you. Don't rush into this decision. I don't know much about surrogacy but I heard some good experiences. Hope you will have success.
Respond to NorahJ
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hi there, how are you. I am really sorry for your miscarriage. What could we do. It's all written up there. We just can't do anything. please make sure that weight has much to do in these things. Having over weight could be one reason. You should take proper balance diet and maintain your weight. I think If you maintain your weight and try to take care allot of yourself and consult some good doctor. you'll be fine.
Respond to jialake
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Hi there! Sorry to hear about your condition. You sound like a courageous lady. How old are you btw? I mean isn’t there like an age limit to go for surrogacy? I’m sorry I am unsure and wanted to confirm. Further, surrogacy is very expensive of a procedure I’ve heard. How can you be sure that you are not risking your money? I mean what’s the success rate with surrogacy? If anyone can answer the poster lady’s and my questions, I’ll be asking my husband to go for this one too. I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Jade. Like our lady here, I’m also infertile and unable to conceive. Confused between adoption and this surrogacy thingy. Many suggest surrogacy from my friends’ circle. But still I just want to make sure that we are betting on a good horse. I mean we are no rich and spending so much money on a single procedure is very important decision for us. Thanks for your comments in advance.
Respond to zandray
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In January 2014, my husband and I decided that this would be “our year” to have a baby. After 11 years together, we felt now was the time, to progress to the “next step”.I will never forget how excited we felt. It was as if I was pregnant already, and of course, I thought it would happen for us straight away as I was only 28! It happened to all of my friends without concern and infertility was a problem for older people, right?After three long months of taking all my prenatal vitamins such as folic acid, my husband and I started “trying”. What struck me most, in the beginning, was this world of fertility advice that I never knew existed.I consider myself a well-educated woman, however, I never knew when ovulation occurred, I never knew how many fertile days I had per month, and I was certainly surprised to find out that cervical mucus played such a role in family planning!The first few months were exciting. I read numerous books, educated myself on all the latest research, and on many occasions obsessively Googled ‘early pregnancy symptoms’ as every niggle and twinge I felt within my body was a sign that I was pregnant.However, it wasn’t long before the excitement turned to disappointment with test after test coming back negative. Initially, my cycle was irregular, so my period would come when I would least expect it. To me, this was a constant reminder of my failure to conceive.It was devastating. I cried many nights in my husband’s arms. I felt as a woman, I was not functioning as I should. My husband reminded me that we were in this together as a team, however, this did little to comfort me.I decided to go for acupuncture to help regularise my cycle, and to this day, I will swear by this treatment for anyone trying to conceive. Although it has not been successful for us to date, my cycle did regularise, and I took great comfort from that. I found myself remaining positive until we hit the dreaded “12-month” milestone.Hope for best still trying.
Respond to orangeden
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In May 2015, my husband and I make an unfaltering decision that this year we will have a baby. After 8 years of relationship and being in love, we believed now was the right time, to have improvement and strength in our relationship. Oh! The joy of thinking to have a baby. I can by no means forget how thrilled we both were feeling. You know that feeling you had in your late twenties that “I will have no problem in conceiving. Yup!”. Never in a million years would you have given a single thought to be infertile. That you can have bareness issue. That doctor will ultimately say “We are sorry, you cannot conceive.” The pain and depression I felt. I can never account them in any words. For whole 4 months, I have taken all prenatal vitamins like; folic acid and other. We tried and tried but all in vain. Then my mother; one day visited me and said “Why don’t to consult a fertility specialist?” At that moment, my world stopped revolving. “Can I be infertile? No! This is not possible. I am only 27. How can this be?” I am a well-educated woman; yet, I by no means was acquainted with what or when this “ovulation” happens, never knew how many fertile days I had in a month and such critical information’s. The happiness of the 1st month’s pregnancy was, Oh Lord, the best feeling I ever had. However, all the excitement vanished when doctors read out the reports and told me the results were negative. Then it all started unbalanced cycle. It would appear when I never anticipated it. This was a failure. A continuous, dooming feeling that you cannot conceive. Devastated. Disturbed. Depressed. So many “D’s”, all of sudden appeared in my life. I was a cry-machine. The support I had not only from my family but from my in-laws and all of a above all my husband, that was only thing which kept me going. My infertility issue was not the one cured by an IVF treatment. We opted for a surrogacy, as my husband told me it is the last option. I gladly accepted it. I wanted a baby and for that I’ll do anything. Today; my son “John” is healthy and full a year ld. I am happy and feeling a sense of completeness. My message to all women out their having same issue, go for surrogacy. It is best and guaranteed. Anna.
Alessia.Violet
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Thank you for this post. I am also in the middle of the surrogacy process. It has been the best decision of my life. Whenever I visit a clinic and surrogate mother gives birth it is always a moment. The happiness on the IP cannot be described in words. I am so excited to go through the same feelings and emotions. Good luck to you. I am sure people will learn a lot from this post.
Respond to anna_khor
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Well dear, what happened has happened. You and I can't change it. My friend got through this situation as well. She tried surrogacy. Surrogacy worked for them. We can't be sure that what it is and whether it is working for us or not. It is unpredictable plus it is really expensive. I must tell you that. Go for surrogacy if you are rich. If you can afford it. If you can't afford it then go for adoption. Try to convince your husband towards adopting. Adoption is really well for you. because that way you are guaranteed that you are going to get a child. Best of luck dear. Hope you had the best.
Respond to rosemary11
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Hey there! I hope you're doing fine. Sudden weight loss without any explanation could be because you may have PCOS. I believe you should talk to your doctor about this. As there are medications that you could take to improve the situation. Also, you should try to introduce healthy lifestyle, consisting of fruits and vegetables. Not only that but also do regular exercise! All these factors will not only improve your PCOS but also help you get pregnant. Other than that surrogacy is the best alternative to experience parenthood. As it allows you to be genetically be associated with the baby. My aunt recently was talking about it and she said that this treatment is being professionally done in Ukraine. I guess you could look it up! In the end I would just say don't lose hope! I can feel what you're going through but just wait and hopefully things will get better. Stay strong!
Respond to Alessia.Violet
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Dear Piahulk!! I hope you and your husband are doing good. I feel very sorry for your situation as you have undergone miscarriage. Its very disturbing for a woman to have miscarriage as she is in dreams of becoming a mother. But dear you are not alone, there are many other people who are on same boat. I am happy that you got an idea of surrogacy. It’s a very safe method and you can do it very easily. But all you is to find a good clinic in your vicinity or out of your domain as in countries it is not legal. I have also done surrogacy and I have 2 cute girls. If you want to know that from where I had got egg donors and all procedures done then I will definitely give you a better decision. Best of luck for you future.
Respond to neviawilliams
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Hi there! dont be so harsh on your self. Think of it as just bad time that will pass soon. You are not alone in this there are couples world over that are getting help. Eastern europe is the hub of surrogacy. Every one is talking about it there. People from far and wide are traveling there just for this purpose. You should also search for a good clinic. And discuss with them about your medical problem. Dont take it on your self. Where there is a will there is a way. so stay strong. Talk to the people who actualy can direct you to some conclusion. let your inlaws think what they like. Dont put your self in this misery. Stay strong. best of luck dear.
Respond to aroosa512